


Its All Wrong

by geekgirl



Series: One Direction Drabbles [9]
Category: One Direction (Band)
Genre: Angst, Canon, I APOLOGIZE, M/M, honestly this is angst for both ships, louis kisses harry but its not what he needs, sorta - Freeform
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-08-17
Updated: 2015-08-17
Packaged: 2018-04-15 07:28:37
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 595
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/4598091
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/geekgirl/pseuds/geekgirl
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Louis has a rough night after Zayn has left and seeks comfort in Harry but its all wrong.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Its All Wrong

**Author's Note:**

> So I wrote this on the day of the boys' recent appearance on Good Morning America. I, in no way think "zouis is dead." This is just me processing my feelings over these two stubborn boys. Plus some Larry angst and too kind Harry because I am trash.

With his head in his hands Louis can pretend his hotel room doesn’t feel so empty. The telly on helps but he knows the hands in his hair are his own and he can’t forget that. 

Harry comes to his room later and Louis is thankful for the extra body until he’s actually in the room and on his couch. Then it feels wrong in a different way.

They sit and pretend to watch the tv but it’s awkward. It’s not because it’s Harry. It’s awkward because he’s not someone else. It’s awkward because on any other night the two of them would be out doing their own things and not watching Friends reruns. 

“We’re all really proud of you, you know? You’re handling it all better than we would have expected,” Harry finally says. 

“Yeah,” he lets his head flop back into his hands and rubs at his newly cut hair and sighs. “Yeah.“ 

"It’s just been a long day. Things will lighten up,” Harry says but they both know it’s a lie. There’s no relief in sight. At least not for Louis. He says nothing anyway. 

After they sit for several more minutes, Louis with his head in his hands perched on the edge of the sofa, he feels large, strong hands reach out and pull him in close. 

At the contact Louis scrambles into Harry, desperate for touch. Louis has always thought himself to be thick skinned, letting a choice few things get to him. But he had someone there every night with him and he didn’t know how much of a difference that made until recently. 

He lets Harry hold his arms around him, circling him into his broad chest. Louis feels better for moment but it’s wrong. Harry is too large, too firm. Too soothing with the way he keeps his hands rubbing up his spine. 

Louis needs more of a distraction from the pressing empty feeling so he lifts his face and presses his lips to Harry’s. He knows he’s surprised, can feel it from his gasp. He never knew he and Zayn relied on each other in this way. But he doesn’t pull away so Louis pushes further. Harry kisses him back. Holds his large hands steady on Louis shoulders as he lets him take control. 

Louis is thankful that things have always been this easy with Harry. Thankful that a kiss could be fun and comforting but didn’t have to mean anything more. Harry would never take more than Louis allowed. 

But it was wrong. 

His lips were too soft and forgiving on his. They lacked the passion Louis desperately needed. His hair was too long in his grip and he didn’t tug back on Louis when he pulled too hard. 

Louis pulls away, gasping, sobs finally taking over. He dives into Harry’s grasp again to hide his breakdown though he knows Harry won’t judge. Sobs rack his body as Louis ruins Harry’s shirt with his tears. He hates Harry’s hands soothing him but not as much as he hates being alone.

“He should be here,” Louis sobs. “He should be here." 

"I know. I know,” he says and Louis is thankful he doesn’t say he misses him too because they all miss Zayn. But Louis needs Zayn more than anything but he doesn’t know how to say it. Doesn’t know how to suck up his pride, let his anger out, and move forward all at the same time. 

He just needs a sign that Zayn feels the weight of his absence as much as he does.


End file.
